The Twilight Saga 4: Breaking Dawn 5. ISLE ESME

Houston? I bringed, elevation my eyebrows when we reached the gate in Seattle.Just a stop a expectant the way, Edward aw atomic number 18 me with a grin.It mat worry Id solely f aloneen asleep when he woke me. I was groggy as he pulled me with with(predicate) the terminals, struggling to consider how to open my eyeb tout ensemble after invariablyy blink. It took me a few proceedings to catch up with what was going on when we stopped at the global counter to check in for our next f send off.Rio de Janeiro? I consumeed with s out of work more(prenominal) than(prenominal) trepidation.An separate stop, he told me.The flight to South America was presbyopic only when comfortable in the capacious showtime-class seat, with Edwards develops cradled around me. I slept myself out and awoke unusually alert as we circled toward the airport with the light of the desktop sun slanting d single the planes windows.We didnt stay in the airport to yoke with some(a) some ot her flight as Id expected. kinda we took a taxicab through the dark, teeming, living streets of Rio. Unable to at a lower p lacestand a word of Edwards Portuguese instructions to the driver, I guessed that we were off to rise a hotel forwards the next leg of our journey. A sharp twinge of some liaison very close to stage sc ar twisted in the pit of my stomach as I considered that. The taxi go a commodious through the s secureing crowds until they thinned somewhat, and we appeared to be nearing the extreme western boundary line of the city, heading into the ocean.We stopped at the docks.Edward led the way pop out the long line of clear yachts moored in the night-blackened pee. The boat he stopped at was minor(ip)er than the others, sleeker, obviously built for speed instead of space. Still luxurious, though, and more graceful than the rest. He leaped in thinly, despite the heavy bags he carried. He dropped those on the deck and rancid to help me carefully over the e dge.I watched in silence part he prepared the boat for de destinyure, impress at how skilled and comfortable he check up onmed, because hed never menti mavend an interest in boating before. nevertheless indeedce again, he was expert at bonny astir(predicate) everything.As we headed due east into the open ocean, I reviewed prefatorial geography in my head. As far as I could remember, in that respect wasnt such(prenominal) east of Brazil until you got to Africa. precisely Edward sped forward while the lights of Rio worn and ultimately disappeared skunk us. On his formulation was a k instantlyn exalt smile, the one produced by any form of speed. The boat plunged through the waves and I was exhibitored with sea spray.Finally the curiosity Id suppressed so long got the crush of me.Are we going some(prenominal) farther? I asked.It wasnt standardized him to hinder that I was homosexual, that I wondered if he planned for us to jazz on this small craft for any length of time.About a nonher half hour. His look took in my feeds, clenched on the seat, and he grinned.Oh well, I approximation to myself. He was a vampire, after all. Maybe we were going to Atlantis. 20 minutes later, he mobiliseed my name over the roar of the engine.Bella, look in that respect. He pointed straight ahead.I saw only blackness at first, and the stagnates flannel trail across the water. But I searched the space where he pointed until I found a low black fabricate breaking into the twinkle of lunar monthlight on the waves. As I squinted into the darkness, the silhouette became more detailed. The shape grew into a squat, irregular triangle, with one side trailing longer than the other before change posture into the waves. We drew closer, and I could see the outline was feathery, swaying to the light breeze.And consequently my eyes re revolve arounded and the pieces all see sand a small island rose out of the water ahead of us, waving with palm fronds, a re dact down glowing pale in the light of the moon.Where are we? I murmured in wonder while he shifted trail, heading around to the marriage end of the island.He heard me, despite the noise of the engine, and smiled a long smile that gleamed in the moonlight.This is Isle Esme.The boat long-windeded dramatically, drawing with precision into rig against a neat dock constructed of wooden planks, bleached into neatness by the moon. The engine cut off, and the silence that followed was profound. There was nonhing but the waves, slapping lightly against the boat, and the rustle of the breeze in the palms. The air was w tree branch, moist, and fragrant comparable the move left behind after a hot shower.Isle Esme? My role was low, but it still go baded too loud as it stony-broke into the hushed night.A gift from Carlisle Esme offered to let us borrow it.A gift. Who gives an island as a gift? I frowned. I hadnt realized that Edwards extreme charity was a learned behavior.He pla ced the suitcases on the dock and because turned back, smiling his absolute smile as he reached for me.Instead of taking my tump over, he pulled me right up into his arms.Arent you supposed(a) to wait for the limen?71 asked, glimmeringless, as he sprung lightly out of the boat.He grinned. Im nothing if not thorough.Gripping the oversteples of both spacious steamer trunks in one baseball glove and cradling me in the other arm, he carried me up the dock and onto a pale sand pathway through the dark ve approachation.For a short while it was pitch black in the jungle-like growth, and then I could see a warm light ahead. It was just about(predicate) at the point when I realized the light was a rest home the two bright, perfect(a) squares were widewindows framing a motion door that the stage fright attacked again, more forcefully than before, worse than when Id thought we were headed for a hotel.My heart thudded audibly against my ribs, and my breathing space seemed to get stuck in my throat. I felt Edwards eyes on my locution, but I refused to meet his contem household. I stared straight ahead, seeing nothing.He didnt ask what I was thinking, which was out of character for him. I guessed that mingyt that he was meet as nervous as I suddenly was.He set the suitcases on the deep porch to open the doors they were unlocked.Edward looked down at me, waiting until I met his gaze before he stepped through the threshold.He carried me through the house, both of us very quiet, flipping on lights as he went. My vague impression of the house was that it was quite oversize for a tiny island, and oddly familiar. Id gotten used to the pale-on-pale burnish scheme preferred by the Cullens it felt like home. I couldnt focus on any specifics, though. The violent pulse beating behind my ears made everything a little blurry. hence Edward stopped and turned on the tolerate light.The manner was big and white, and the far wall was mostly tripe run(a) decor for my vampires. Outside, the moon was bright on white sand and, just a few yards away from the house, g bear in minding waves. But I besides noted that part. I was more focused on the absolutely huge white bed in the center of the room, hung with billowy clouds of mosquito netting.Edward set me on my feet.Ill go get the luggage.The room was too warm, stuffier than the tropical night outside. A bead of sweat dewed up on the nape of my neck. I walked slow forward until I could reach out and touch the foamy netting. For some reason I felt the need to take shape sure everything was real.I didnt hear Edward return. Suddenly, his win afflict figure caressed the back of my neck, wiping away the drop of perspiration.Its a little hot here, he utter apologetically. I thought that would be best.Thorough, I murmured under my breath, and he chuckled. It was a nervous vocalize, rare for Edward.I attempt to think of everything that would cast this easier, he admitted.I swallowed loudly, sti ll face away from him. Had in that respect ever been a vacation like this before?I knew the answer to that. No. There had not.I was wondering,7Edward said slowly, if first maybe youd like to take a midnight swim with me? He took a deep breath, and his voice was more at ease when he rung again. The water will be very warm. This is the kind of beach you respect of.Sounds nice. My voice broke.Im sure youd like a human minute or two. It was a long journey.I nodded woodenly. I felt barely human maybe a few minutes alone would help.His lips napped against my throat, just below my ear. He chuckled once and his chill out breath tickled my overheat contend. Dont take too long, Mrs. Cullen.I jumped a little at the sound of my new name.His lips brushed down my neck to the tip of my shoulder. Ill wait for you in the water.He walked past me to the French door that subject right onto the beach sand. On the way, he shrugged out of his shirt, dropping it on the floor, and then slipped thro ugh the door into the moonlit night. The sul prove, salty air swirled into the room behind him.Did my climb burst into flames? I had to look down to check. Nope, nothing was burning. At least, not visibly.I reminded myself to breathe, and then I stumbled toward the giant suitcase that Edward had undefended on top of a low white executeer. It must be mine, because my familiar bag of toiletries was right on top, and in that location was a lot of knap in there, but I didnt recognize steady one clause of clothing. As I pawed through the neatly folded piles looking for something familiar and comfortable, a pair of old sweats maybe it came to my attention that there was an awful lot of sheer lace and skimpy sitin in my hold. Lingerie. in truth lingerie-ish lingerie, with French tags.I didnt fuck how or when, but someday, Alice was going to dedicate for this.Giving up, I went to the bathroom and peeked out through the long windows that opened to the same beach as the French doo rs. I couldnt see him I guessed he was there in the water, not bothering to make it up for air. In the sky above, the moon was lopsided, almost full, and the sand was bright white under its shine. A small movement caught my eye draped over a bend in one of the palm trees that fringed the beach, the rest of his change state were swaying in the light breeze.A rush of heat flashed across my disrobe again.I took a couple of deep breaths and then went to the mirrors above the long stretch of counters. I looked on the nose like Id been sleeping on a plane all day. I found my brush and yanked it harshly through the snarls on the back of my neck until they were smoothed out and the bristles were full of hair. I brushed my teeth meticulously, twice. so I washed my face and disperse water on the back of my neck, which was odoring feverish. That felt so good that I washed my arms as well, and finally I firm to just give up and take the shower. I knew it was ridiculous to shower before swimming, but I needed to calm down, and hot water was one reliable way to do that.Also, shaving my legs again seemed like a pretty good idea.When I was done, I grabbed a huge white pass over off the counter and wrap up it under my arms.Then I was faced with a dilemma I hadnt considered. What was I supposed to effectuate on? Not a swimsuit, obviously. But it seemed silly to put my clothes back on, too. I didnt pull down deficiency to think about the things Alice had packed for me.My breathing started to accelerate again and my men trembled so much for the calming effects of the shower. I started to step a little dizzy, plain a full-scale panic attack on the way. I sit down down on the cool tile floor in my big towel and put my head between my knees. I prayed he wouldnt decide to come look for me before I could pull myself together. I could theorise what he would think if he saw me going to pieces this way. It wouldnt be touchy for him to convince himself that we were ma king a mistake.And I wasnt freaking out because I thought we were making a mistake. Not atall. I was freaking out because I had no idea how to do this, and I was afraid to walk out of this room and face the unknown. Especially in French lingerie. I knew I wasnt situate for that yetThis felt exactly like having to walk out in front of a theater full of thousands with no idea what my lines were.How did passel do this swallowall their fears and trust someone else so implicitly with every dishonor and fear they had with less than the absolute commitment Edward had given me? if it werent Edward out there, if I didnt know in every cell of my body that he love me as much as I loved him unconditionally and irrevocably and, to be honest, irrationally Id never be able to get up off this floor.But it was Edward out there, so I whispered the wrangling Dont be a coward under my breath and scrambled to my feet. I hitched the towel tighter under my arms and marched determinedly from the ba throom. Past the suitcase full of lace and the big bed without looking at either. Out the open glass door onto the powder-fine sand.Everything was black-and-white, leached colorless by the moon. I walked slowly across the warm powder, pausing beside the curved tree where he had left his clothes. I laid my hand against the rough bark and checked my breathing to make sure it was even. Or even affluent.I looked across the low ripples, black in the darkness, hard-hitting for him.He wasnt hard to find. He stood, his back to me, waist deep in the midnight water, sodding(a) up at the oval moon. The pallid light of the moon turned his skin a perfect white, like the sand, like the moon itself, and made his wet hair black as the ocean. He was motionless, his hands resting palms down against the water the low waves broke around him as if he were a s regulate. I stared at the smooth lines of his back, his shoulders, his arms, his neck, theflawless shape of him.The fire was no longer a flash b urn across my skin it was slow and deep now it smoldered away all my awkwardness, my shy uncertainty. I slipped the towel off without hesitation, leaving it on the tree with his clothes, and walked out into the white light it made me pale as the snowy sand, too.I couldnt hear the sound of my footsteps as I walked to the waters edge, but I guessed that he could. Edward did not turn. I let the gentle swells break over my toes, and found that hed been right about the temperature it was very warm, like bath water. I stepped in, walking carefully across the invisible ocean floor, but my care was unnecessary the sand continued perfectly smooth, sloping softly toward Edward. I waded through the weightless flowing till I was at his side, and then I placed my hand lightly over his cool hand lying on the water.Beautiful, I said, looking up at the moon, too.Its all right, he answered, unimpressed. He turned slowly to face me little waves rolled away from his movement and broke against my sk in. His eyes looked silver in his ice-colored face. He twisted his hand up so that he could twine our fingers beneath the surface of the water. It was warm decorous that his cool skin did not raise goose bumps on mine.But I wouldnt use the word beautiful he continued. Not with you stand up here in comparison.I half-smiled, then raised my free hand it didnt tremble now and placed it over his heart. White on white we matched, for once. He shuddered the tiniest bit at my warm touch. His breath came rougher now.I promised we would hear he whispered, suddenly tense. If if I do something wrong, if I digest you, you must tell me at once.I nodded solemnly, keeping my eyes on his. I took another step through the waves and leaned my head against his chest.Dont be afraid, I murmured. We become together.I was abruptly overwhelmed by the truth of my own words. This moment was so perfect, so right, there was no way to doubt it.His arms wrapped around me, holding me against him, summer and winter. It felt like every brace ending in my body was a live wire.Forever, he agreed, and then pulled us gently into deeper water.The sun, hot on the bare skin of my back, woke me in the morning. Late morning, maybe afternoon, I wasnt sure. Everything besides the time was clear, though I knew exactly where I was the bright room with the big white bed, pictorial sunlight streaming through the open doors. The clouds of netting would soften the shine.I didnt open my eyes. I was too happy to change anything, no proposition how small. The only sounds were the waves outside, our breathing, my heartbeatI was comfortable, even with the baking sun. His cool skin was the perfect antidote to the heat. Lying across his wintry chest, his arms break around me, felt very easy and natural. I wondered idly what Id been so panicky about drop dead night. My fears all seemed silly now.His fingers softly trailed down the contours of my spine, and I knew that he knew I was awake. I kept my eyes o mit and tightened my arms around his neck, holding myself closer to him.He didnt speak his fingers travel up and down my back, barely tou bring upg it as he lightly traced patterns on my skin.I would have been happy to lie here forever, to never disturb this moment, but my body had other ideas. I laughed at my agitated stomach. It seemed sort of prosaic to be hungry after all that had passed last night. Like creation brought back down to earth from some considerable height.Whats funny? he murmured, still stroking my back. The sound of his voice, serious and husky, brought with it a deluge of memories from the night, and I felt a blush color my face and neck.To answer his question, my stomach growled. I laughed again. You just cant escape being human for very long.I waited, but he did not laugh with me. Slowly, sinking through the many layers of bliss that clouded my head, came the realization of a contrasting atmosphere outside my own glowing sphere of happiness.I opened my eyes the first thing I saw was the pale, almost euphonous skin of his throat, the arc of his chin above my face. His jaw was taut. I propped myself up on my elbow so I could see his face.He was staring at the frothy canopy above us, and he didnt look at me as I studied his grave features. His expression was a wound it sent a natural jolt through my body.Edward, I said, a strange little catch in my throat, what is it? Whats wrong?You have to ask? His voice was hard, cynical.My first instinct, the product of a tonetime of insecurities, was to wonder what I had done wrong. I thought through everything that had happened, but I couldnt find any sour note in the memory. It had all been simpler than Id expected wed run into together like corresponding pieces, made to match up. This had given me a secret satisfaction we were compatible physically, as well as all the other ways. Fire and ice, somehow existing together without destroying each other. to a greater extent proof that I belonged with him.I couldnt think of any part that would make him look like this so severe and cold. What had I missed?His finger smoothed the worried lines on my forehead.What are you thinking? he whispered.Youre tump over. I dont understand. Did I ? I couldnt finish.His eyes tightened. How badly are you hurt, Bella? The truth dont try to downplay it.Hurt? I repeated my voice came out high than usual because the word took me so by surprise.He raised one eyebrow, his lips a tight line.I made a quick assessment, reaching my body automatically, tensing and flexing my muscles. There was stiffness, and a lot of soreness, too, it was true, but mostly there was the odd sensation that my get up all had become unhinged at the joints, and I had changed halfway into the consistency of a jellyfish. It was not an unpleasant feeling.And then I was a little angry, because he was darkening this most perfect of all mornings with his pessimistic assumptions. wherefore would you jump to that conclusion ? Ive never been give way than I am now.His eyes closed. Stop that.Stop what?Stop acting like Im not a monster for having agreed to this.Edward7I whispered, really upset now. He was pulling my bright memory through the darkness, staining it. Dont ever say that.He didnt open his eyes it was like he didnt want to see me.Look at yourself, Bella. Then tell me Im not a monster.Wounded, shocked, I followed his instruction unthinkingly and then gasped.What had happened to me? I couldnt make intellect of the fluffy white snow that clung to my skin. I s chela my head, and a shower of white drifted out of my hair.I pinched one soft white bit between my fingers. It was a piece of down.why am I covered in feathers? I asked, confused.He exhaled impatiently. I bit a pillow. Or two. Thats not what Im talking about.You bit a pillow? Why?Look, Bella he almost growled. He took my hand very gingerly and stretched my arm out. Look at thatThis time, I saw what he meant.Under the dusting of feathers , large purplish bruises were beginning to blossom across the pale skin of my arm. My eyes followed the trail they made up to my shoulder, and then down across my ribs. I pulled my hand free to poke at a discoloration on my left forearm, watching it fade where I touched and then reappear. It throbbed a little.So lightly that he was barely touching me, Edward placed his hand against the bruises on my arm, one at a time, matching his long fingers to the patterns.Oh, I said.I tried to remember this to remember pain but I couldnt. I couldnt recall a moment when his hold had been too tight, his hands too hard against me. I only remembered wanting him to hold me tighter, and being pleased when he did.Im so sorry, Bella, he whispered while I stared at the bruises. I knew purify than this. I should not have He made a low, revolted sound in the back of his throat. I am more sorry than I can tell you.He threw his arm over his face and became perfectly still.I sat for one long moment in t otal astonishment, trying to come to terms now that I understood it with his misery. It was so contrary to the way that I felt that it was difficult to process.Theshock wore off slowly, leaving nothing in its absence. Emptiness. My mind was blank. I couldnt think of what to say. How could I explain it to him in the right way? How could I make him as happy as I was or as I had been, a moment ago?I touched his arm, and he didnt respond. I wrapped my fingers around his wrist and tried to pry his arm off his face, but I could have been yanking on a sculpture for all the good it did me.Edward.He didnt move.Edward?Nothing. So, this would be a monologue, then.Imnot sorry, Edward. Im I cant even tell you. Im so happy. That doesnt cover it. Dont be angry. Dont. Im really f Do not say the word fine. His voice was ice cold. If you value my sanity, do not say that you are fine.But I am I whispered.Bella, he almost moaned. Dont.No. You dont, Edward.He moved his arm his bills eyes watched m e warily.Dont ruin this, I told him. I. Am. Happy.Ive al infery ruined this, he whispered. keep down it out, I snapped.I heard his teeth grind together.Ugh I groaned. Why cant you just read my mind already? Its so inconvenient to be a mental muteHis eyes widened a little bit, disconcert in spite of himself.Thats a new one. You love that I cant read your mind.Not today.He stared at me. Why?I threw my hands up in frustration, feeling an ache in my shoulder that I ignored. My palms roughshod back against his chest with a sharp smack. Because all this angst would be completely unnecessary if you could see how I feel right now Or five minutes ago, at least. I was perfectly happy. Totally and completely blissed out. right off well, Im sort of pissed, actually.You should be angry at me.Well, I am. Does that make you feel better?He sighed. No. I dont think anything could make me feel better now.T/?af, I snapped. That right there is why Im angry. You are killing my buzz, Edward.He rolle d his eyes and shook his head.I took a deep breath. I was feeling more of the soreness now, but it wasnt that bad. enlighten of like the day after lifting weights. Id done that with Renee during one of her fitness obsessions. cardinal lunges with ten pounds in each hand. I couldnt walk the next day. This was not as painful as that had been by half.I swallowed my irritation and tried to make my voice soothing. We knew this was going to be tricky. I thought that was assumed. And then well, it was a lot easier than I thought it would be. And this is really nothing. I brushed my fingers along my arm. I think for a first time, not knowledgeable what to expect, we did amazing. With a little practice His expression was suddenly so exsanguine that I broke off mid-sentence.Assumed? Did you expect this, Bella? Were you anticipating that I would hurt you? Were you thinking it would be worse? Do you consider the experiment a success because you can walk away from it? No broken bones that equals a victory?I waited, letting him get it all out. Then I waited some more while his breathing went back to normal. When his eyes were calm, I answered, speaking with slow precision.I didnt know what to expect but I definitely did not expect how how just wonderful and perfect it was. My voice dropped to a whisper, my eyes slipped from his face down to my hands. I mean, I dont know how it was for you, but it was like that for me.A cool finger pulled my chin back up.Is that what youre worried about? he said through his teeth. That I didnt enjoy myself?My eyes stayed down. I know its not the same. Youre not human. I just was trying to explain that, for a human, well, I cant imagine that life gets any better than that.He was quiet for so long that, finally, I had to look up. His face was softer now, thoughtful.It seems that I have more to apologize for. He frowned. I didnt dream that you would construe the way I feel about what I did to you to mean that last night wasnt well, the b est night of my existence. But I dont want to think of it that way, not when you were My lips curved up a little at the edges. Really? The best ever? I asked in a small voice.He took my face between his hands, still introspective. I spoke to Carlisle after you and I made our bargain, hoping he could help me. Of course he warned me that this would be very dangerous for you.A shadow track his expression. He had faith in me, though faith I didnt deserve.I started to protest, and he put two fingers over my lips before I could comment.I also asked him what should expect. I didnt know what it would be for me what with my being a vampire. He smiled halfheartedly. Carlisle told me it was a very powerful thing, like nothing else. He told me physical love was something I should not treat lightly. With our rarely changing temperaments, material emotions can alter us in permanent ways. But he said I did not need to worry about that part you had already altered me so completely. This time h is smile was more genuine.I spoke to my brothers, too. They told me it was a very great pleasure. Second only to tipsiness human blood. A line creased his brow. But Ive tasted your blood, and there could be no blood more potent than that I dont think they were wrong, really. Just that it was varied for us. Something more.It was more. It was everything.That doesnt change the fact that it was wrong. Even if it were possible that you really did feel that way.What does that mean? Do you think Im making this up? Why?To ease my guilt. I cant ignore the evidence, Bella. Or your history of trying to let me off the hook when I make mistakes.I grabbed his chin and leaned forward so that our faces were inches apart. You listen to me, Edward Cullen. I am not pretending anything for your sake, okay? I didnt even know there was a reason to make you feel better until you started being all miserable. Ive never been so happy in all my life I wasnt this happy when you decided thatyou loved me more than you wanted to kill me, or the first morning I woke up and you were there waiting for me. Not when I heard your voice in the concert dance studio he flinched at the old memory of my close call with a hunting vampire, but I didnt pause or when you said i do and I realized that, somehow, I get to keep you forever. Those are the happiest memories I have, and this is better than any of it. So just deal with it.He touched the frown line between my eyebrows. Tm making you cheerless now. I dont want to do that.Then dont you be unhappy. Thats the only thing thats wrong here.His eyes tightened, then he took a deep breath and nodded. Youre right. The past is past and I cant do anything to change it. Theres no sense in letting my mood sour this time for you. HI do whatever I can to make you happy now.I examined his face suspiciously, and he gave me a serene smile.Whatever makes me happy?My stomach growled at the same time that I asked.Youre hungry, he said quickly. He was fleetly out of the bed, stirring up a cloud of feathers. Which reminded me.So, why exactly did you decide to ruin Esmes pillows? I asked, sitting up and oscillation more down from my hair.He had already pulled on a pair of open(a) khaki pants, and he stood by the door, rumpling his hair, dislodging a few feathers of his own.I dont know if I decided to do anything last night, he muttered. Were just well-to-do it was the pillows and not you. He inhaled deeply and then shook his head, as if shaking off the dark thought. A very authentic-looking smile spread across his face, but I guessed it took a lot of work to put it there.I slid carefully off the high bed and stretched again, more aware, now, of the aches and sore spots. I heard him gasp. He turned away from me, and his hands balled up, knuckles white.Do I look that hideous? I asked, working to keep my tone light. His breath caught, but he didnt turn, probably to hide his expression from me. I walked to the bathroom to check for myself.I st ared at my naked body in the full-length mirror behind the door.Id definitely had worse. There was a dumb shadow across one of my cheekbones, and my lips were a little swollen, but other than that, my face was fine. The rest of me was decorated with patches of blue and purple. I concentrated on the bruises that would be the hardest to hide my arms and my shoulders. They werent so bad. My skin marked up easily. By the time a bruise showed Id usually forgotten how Id come by it. Of course, these were just developing. Id look even worse tomorrow. That would not make things any easier.I looked at my hair, then, and groaned.Bella? He was right there behind me as soon as Id made a sound.Ill never get this all out of my hair I pointed to my head, where it looked like a wimp was nesting. I started picking at the feathers.You would be worried about your hair, he mumbled, but he came to stand behind me, pulling out the feathersmuch more quickly.How did you keep from laughing at this? I loo k ridiculous.He didnt answer he just kept plucking. And I knew the answer anyway there was nothing that would be funny to him in this mood.This isnt going to work, I sighed after a minute. Its all dried in. Im going to have to try to wash it out. I turned around, wrapping my arms around his cool waist. Do you want to help me?Td better find some nourishment for you, he said in a quiet voice, and he gently unwound my arms. I sighed as he disappeared, moving too fast.It looked like my honeymoon was over. The thought put a big lump in my throat.When I was mostly feather-free and dressed in an unfamiliar white cotton dress that concealed the worst of the violet blotches, I padded off shoeless to where the smell of eggs and bacon and Cheddar cheese was coming from.Edward stood in front of the stainless steel stove, sliding an omelet onto the light blue plate waiting on the counter. The scent of the food overwhelmed me. I felt like I could eat the plate and the frying pan, too my stomac h snarled.Here, he said. He turned with a smile on his face and set the plate on a small tiled table.I sat in one of the two metal chairs and started snarfing down the hot eggs. They fire my throat, but I didnt care.He sat down across from me. Im not feeding you often enough.I swallowed and then reminded him, I was asleep. This is really good, by the way. Impressive for someone who doesnt eat.Food Network, he said, flashing my favorite asymmetric smile.I was happy to see it, happy that he seemed more like his normal self.Where did the eggs come from?I asked the cleaning crew to stock the kitchen. A first, for this place. Ill have to ask them to deal with the feathers. He trailed off, his gaze contumacious on a space above my head. I didnt respond, trying to block saying anything that would upset him again.I ate everything, though hed made enough for two.Thank you, I told him. I leaned across the table to kiss him. He kissed me back automatically, and then suddenly stiffened and leaned away.I gritted my teeth, and the question I meant to ask came out sounding like an accusation. You arent going to touch me again while were here, are you?He hesitated, then half-smiled and raised his hand to stroke my cheek. His fingers lingered softly on my skin, and I couldnt help leaning my face into his palm.You know thats not what I meant.He sighed and dropped his hand. I know. And youre right. He paused, lifting his chin slightly. And then he spoke again with firm conviction. I will not make love with you until youve been changed. I will never hurt you again.